mmmm.

I am a very annoyed person.
thought i would write that one
down. I HATE IT when people
expect you to do things for them
and they dont do anything for you.


On the good side. i have like 4 and a half months of high school
left. I have the best of friends even though they may be bipolar.
My family means EVERYTHING to me. God is the most important
thing in my life. I really do need to act like it more. If it wasnt for
him i wouldnt have great things in my life like i do now.

My friendship with Jamie is going down the drain.
I am trying to make new friends because i do need
to have more than 2.

Here are some random pet peeves.

**when guys want sexual picturess
**when people talk when you are talking
**Haveing no money or gas.
**Being talked to like your stupid
**Being told what to do by people
who think they are over you...
**Abortion
**KNOW IT ALLS
**blah blah blah


pointless.

DEPRESSION !!

omgee.
i have like the HUGEST crush
on a guy that had no idea who
i am...Max Lerner. From TWO-
A-DAYS. omg. its like bad too.
AHHHHH....He is amazing <3





im a such a freakin loser.
i mean its not because he
was on two-a-days its because
he is GORGEOUS. OMG im
sooo dumb.




ahhh...=[

ANDDD !!

UGHHHH...i really wanna be Kelsey Osley's friend
for some reason. and its like some days shell talk
to me and be cool and then some days shell talk
to me like im satan.

But i have NO IDEA why i wanna be her friend
so bad. This is like 3rd grade shit. dumb dumb
DUMB !!


oh well.
shit happens.






...pauls fault

This post isn't so bad....

Lately (since my last post) its been quite good.

WeekEnd:
Friday-Woke up at like 5:45 went and ate
breakfast with alex before she went to school.
SCHOOL.
Got paid..then later on friday night Alex, Destinee,
Jackie, Lovell, and I went to Wings...then to other
random places. Got home at like ehhhh 11:00.

Saturday-Woke up at like 8:30 had to go to work
at 10:00. Got off at 6:30. Came home. My daddy
gave me a foot rub cause my right foot hurt badly.
Which is odd because he is usually not nice haha.

but my plans for today is going to church.
EATING A WINGS :) (again) going to see
my loveing grandma (nan) then going to
brookwood mall.

Theres really nothing to say when im not in
a sad or pissed mood. haha. but the band
banquet is in March and i really doubt ima
have a date...CAUSE IM A LOSERR =[

and im not going to prom.
prom is GAYYYYY. =]

but this is getting to lame.

peace.

ohmygee.

everything was fine today until i went to damn
DANCE at teridonna...ughhh, im so self centered
about dance now. =[


andddd ever since Jessica Colbert and
Ethan Marcus started danceing there
i suck freakin butt. It REALLY depresses
me. I use to be soo good..now im not. So
what if im flexable. I WAANNA DANCE.
and i cant. and i HATE IT. words cant
describe how sucky i feel....damn it.

Something really hurt me today i mean
it brought tears to my eyes. my mom
said that she thinks my daddy loves money
more than her...

i dont think so. i wanna ask him but idk
how that will turn out. sometimes i really
do feel my family is falling apart...my gosh
im tearing up now. But i know my daddy
is sooo far from that way. he just doesnt show
emotion. ;( and i wish he did sometimes.


my mommy does soo fucking much for everyone
but people give her crap. i know im guilty of it
but when shes in trouble she cant tell anyone
because they will talk shit to her about how she
messed up excepecially her sisters. ;{ i love my mommy.


damn im just letting everything out on here.
i hope all this crap makes since. how knows.


i tryed saying sorry to matt shewmake for just
ditching him...he was soo sweet. but who the crap
knowssss.


im done.
the end.

today is an emo day...

omg...if i couldnt feel any worse right now.
i mean my chest hurts. i have an headache.
im just all around emo right now...i FUCKIN
HATE seeing pretty girls UGLY girls
normal looking girls get boyfriends in the snap of a finger.
and its been like a year and a half since i have had one.
i think its because im picky. i coulda had matt shewmake
but he kinda freaked me out and rushed things. frank doganaro (sp)
was just a horn ball. one guy i miss TWO guys i miss are
Chandler Cross and Matt Wade. Those were gentlemen.
There girlfriends are very lucky. i always dend to screw shit up with
guys...damn.

Chandler even told me he didnt wanna gf but i thought
i could handle it but NO I CANT. but that has been over a
year ago...

Matt really liked me and i wish i hung out with him...if it happened
now instead of FOREVER ago. DAMN DAMN DAMN.


like ever one of these damn blogs are gonna probably be about
how i HATE being single. because i guessthats what gets me down
the absoute MOST. but yeah other than boy shit.


im passing all my classess with good/decent grades.
BAND=100
SCOCIOLOGY=80 something probably.
WE THE PEOPLE=100
ENGLISH=78
BAND=100
PRECAL=75
GOVERNMENT=86
ANATOMY=75.

Im proud of myself.
my senior year is flying by.
and it had to be my best year
in grades.

and also i made a 17 on my 3rd time
taken the ACT...haha YAY !!

kinda...



So i pretty much think im lossing my
best friend (Jamie Couch). She just
seems different. i mean idk. i know
what i mean i just dont know how to
put it in words.

Its time for bed...sighh
school is in the morning.

whelp..

well...its the new year.
i plan on lossing weight
cause im in need to loss
some...



okay sooo..i actually think
me and kelsey osley are finally
cool =)
which makes me happy.


Pauls trying to talk to me again.
GAY..


School starts in 3 days.
WHICH IS GAY...how lame
is it to have TWO weeks
out for the christmas break
when it use to be like a month.


i havent studied at ALL for these exams.
dang...


i really wish i had a boyfriend.
i miss it...theres no one out
there for me i guess.....=((
I WANT A BOYFRIEND !!

...whattsss wrong with me?